Movember Update Four.

It's the last week to donate to Movember! So get off your ass and help us finally beat prostate cancer!

Donate Here!

A song about nothing.

I'm currently trying to get the ball rolling on two media projects. Lots of paper is being written on. It's been a long time.

I need to get something going for myself.

The Pursuit of Exercise.

Dear Fun Runners,

What the fuck?

Just because you are better then the rest of us lazy slobs is no excuse to run towards on coming traffic in black clothes in the dark. Did I mention it is foggy too?

Seriously how hard is it to purchase your running spandex with some 3M reflective stripes on it? It probably affects how aerodynamic you are but I assume it isn’t hard. Almost every piece of outdoor clothing I own has some kind of reflective material on it and I don’t remember the last time I exercised. Get some of those wristbands I used to have for riding my bicycle at night.

Can’t afford those $2 wristbands? Wrap yourself in tinfoil. Although the side affect will be that people thing you are some kind of whack job running from aliens but at least they will see you a mile away when driving.

Do you still want to run in the dark and not wear reflective clothes? Buy a fucking treadmill and turn off the fucking lights.

Better yet build a time machine go back to the early 1990’s and buy some of those shoes with the red flashing lights in the heel and some florescent green, pink, and yellow jogging outfits.

Tell you what next time I’m not going half into the lane of oncoming traffic because you are a moron and have no concern for your person safety. Learn to run on a sidewalk and wear some reflective clothing for those nightly fun runs.

Love,
Tyson.

 

Movember Update Three.

Week three. Almost a beard. Donate to Movember.

Snow Cones.

In high school I was voted most likely to move to the North Pole. I don't know why (maybe a striking resemblance to a young Kris Kringle) but the more I sit on the thought it makes more sense. But they were a little off on what hemisphere I wanted to go to.

I'd rather go to the South Pole. Despite what you think it isn’t to fight a shape shifting alien but to hunt for forgotten scotch.

Maybe hang out with penguins too.

Today I was made aware of an expedition where they are going to be drilling for one hundred year old scotch in Antarctica. Apparently this ancient alcohol was found beneath one of Shackletons huts by restoration people but it is too deep in the ice to get out with out drilling for it. It seems that the scotch would be perfectly preserved and since scotch doesn’t age in a glass bottle it would taste exactly how it tasted when Shackleton  drank it. 

How awesome would that be to tell people that was your job?

"Oh you're an accountant? Sounds boring. My company sends me on crazy expeditions to rescue old scotch. Yup, that's where I got this beard."

Maybe that is why I grow a beard professionally. But for the last several years all I've craved is adventure so I know s good one when I see it. I would happily drop everything to go on this one or something similar.

Hopefully to a distant tropical island to find a stash of rum left by rum runners.

Read on.