The Pursuit of Exercise.

Dear Fun Runners,

What the fuck?

Just because you are better then the rest of us lazy slobs is no excuse to run towards on coming traffic in black clothes in the dark. Did I mention it is foggy too?

Seriously how hard is it to purchase your running spandex with some 3M reflective stripes on it? It probably affects how aerodynamic you are but I assume it isn’t hard. Almost every piece of outdoor clothing I own has some kind of reflective material on it and I don’t remember the last time I exercised. Get some of those wristbands I used to have for riding my bicycle at night.

Can’t afford those $2 wristbands? Wrap yourself in tinfoil. Although the side affect will be that people thing you are some kind of whack job running from aliens but at least they will see you a mile away when driving.

Do you still want to run in the dark and not wear reflective clothes? Buy a fucking treadmill and turn off the fucking lights.

Better yet build a time machine go back to the early 1990’s and buy some of those shoes with the red flashing lights in the heel and some florescent green, pink, and yellow jogging outfits.

Tell you what next time I’m not going half into the lane of oncoming traffic because you are a moron and have no concern for your person safety. Learn to run on a sidewalk and wear some reflective clothing for those nightly fun runs.

Love,
Tyson.

 

Roads don't work.

We built bicycle lanes and sidewalks for a reason. To be ignored.

More and more as I become accustom to driving over the last six years I’ve slowly become exceedingly irritated by pedestrians and cyclists. Not so much that I have to share a road with them but the fact that there is an infrastructure that my taxes pay for that they choose to ignore.  We build our roads wider so they can have both a bicycle lane and a sidewalk for pedestrians so why insist in riding in the middle of the road.  I get that cyclist want to be considered a vehicle but when push comes to shove they really aren’t.

Every sunny Sunday this summer cyclists invaded the roads I live near. Packs of twenty by three abreast would fly down the road blocking traffic and ignoring the 4 Way stop. All while giving the drivers with right of way angry scowls and flipping the odd rude gesture. I’m pretty sure that isn’t kosher if you are in a car so why are cyclists allowed to do it? Technically they are supposed to ride single file but that won’t happen until there is some kind of accident involving Simon Wakefield. Oh wait that did happen and nothing changed on the Peninsula.

Single cyclists are the worst in my opinion. While driving home from work yesterday in the post 5PM traffic from the airport we are slowed down by a cyclist and his blatant refusal of using the bike path three feet to his right. Backing us up to the roundabout I sat there and wondered “Why not use what was built for you to utilize and avoid situations like this?” The cyclist kept looking back at the car behind him as it honked at him with a look of bewilderment. I wonder who was more confused.

One of my other problem right now is runners. That’s right I’m singling you out over those regular bipeds. Not all runners are bad. But I’m tired of the ones who decide to run in black clothing after dark in the road and the ones who decide to run in oncoming traffic in the middle of the road refusing to move for vehicles. I guess if you want to be a runner you need some kind of death wish. Must be why it doesn’t appeal to me that and my Vans aren’t the greatest to run in.

Hey fun runners have you heard of this neat invention called sidewalks and reflective clothing?

Is there anything worse then those old folks in scooters? No there isn’t and that is why I saved them for last. They commit all the same unpleasant activities as cyclists and runners but have the balls (or stupidity) to drive through heavy traffic. There are hundreds of crosswalks in this pedestrian friendly town and they cause more near accidents more then anything else I know of. Swerving into oncoming traffic to get to that coffee shop that reminds me of a hospital always seems so timesaving instead of going to the crosswalk five feet away where people don’t need to slam on their brakes.

Are we the drivers on the road the real menaces or are those sympathetic exercise enthusiasts and senile the real trouble on the road. Depending on what group you fall under you make a different decision. Follow the rules, law, and proper safety precautions out there on the road and finally we can all get along.

In closing I’m going to leave you with a quote yelled at me by an old lady driving a scooter while I was riding my bike on the bike path. “The bike path is not for bicycles!”

 

Incoherent double talk.

I like the idea of being known. It is a great concept. I like the fact that friends, family, and complete strangers know me. But last night it kind of bugged me.

I was at the pub in Sidney to trying to see Pupshaw, Acres of Lions, and Immaculate Machine play an amazing show and people kept sitting down at our table and being "Tyson how are you?" Or "You don't know me but I know you..."

It seems people in Sidney seem to  know me for a reputation I never seemed to think I had. To be clear I still don't even know what it is but it may or may not be a good one. This one guy told me he knew my sister and said he had heard that I was an asshole. A nice young lady knew more then one of my ex girlfriends and assumed I was an asshole because of what my ex said. She also knew my preferred sexual position and every orifices I had penetrated on a certain ex in the course of our relationship.

There were a few people at the pub last night who knew me for good reasons but I didn't know who they were (Eventually I put the pieces together though). They were happy that had a good job, knew at one point I worked for The Zone, and that I was a good person. They also thought I had succeeded in life which is weird because I don't think that.

The idea of being known is great but I don't know if I like it anymore. We all dream of being a "name" but what if it's a bad one due to a bad reputation created by someone who spites you.

**Note I got to drunk to properly write what I was thinking. Six deep and not eating since 9:30 am never a good idea.